How Critical is it to Say The Right Thing First?

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How Important are the First 5 Seconds Of a Conversation?

All psychologists agree that the first impression is formed within the first second of a visual encounter and the first 3-7 seconds of an auditory one. After that first impression, people subconsciously look for confirmation of the first impression to see if they were right, so reversing it can be a chore.

Since I study and write about sales psychology, I process first impressions at a snail's pace. Like a “finish carpenter” who walks into a well trimmed room, I have to examine the situation for a moment and process it before I get my first impression. It takes me twice as long. My wife on the other hand has a laser fast radar and can arrive at a determination in a nanosecond. My point? Even the slowest of us don’t take long to adhere trust or skepticism to a new encounter.

Most sales professionals are calling or texting to follow up on an inquiry or a lead, so their approach is critical. Refining their approach is more critical than most of them realize, or they would gravitate toward scripts, analyzing words and chronological order. The sad truth is that there are so many HUGE egos in the sales profession that it lacks the team work and collaboration needed to be at its best in too many instances. “Culture eats strategy for breakfast,” is what Drucker said. An open and honest culture of examination and role playing would teach sales pros that the first few seconds they engage a new relationship are crucial. They would feel the momentum that a positive and polished approach would provide.

Let’s examine an example or two from services from common real world examples:

If you call a company on the phone and the first thing you hear is: “Hello, may I help you?” in a monotone voice delivered by someone who sounds like they can’t wait until it’s closing time, that makes you feel a certain way. Unimpressed with the apathy most likely. Conversely, if you dial a business for the first time and you get someone with a spark of professional excitement who answers, "Thank you for calling Prestige Pianos, home of the finest pianos in every price range, this is John,” the feeling you get is the diametric opposite. In fact, in today’s automated world, it almost always sounds and feels like a breath of fresh air. 

If you are chasing leads (to use a workshop phrase), attitude AND chronological order are equally important. In fact, during outreach, these are more critical than catching a call or an inquiry, because the person you are reaching out to hasn’t already taken an action or a step in your direction. There are a million ways to screw it up so allow me to to save your time, and mine, and give you a properly constructed script and the psychological underpinnings, "why.”

If you have a lead with a name and a preferred piano type, this would be the correct approach if leaving a voice mail: 

“Hi John! This is Jack with Prestige Pianos thanking you for your inquiry about upright pianos. We are the friendliest place in Nashville to get dependable piano information. Please call me back at your next convenience. I have a couple of brief questions to ask that will allow me to serve you best. Once more, this is Jack at Prestige Pianos hoping I caught you having a great day!”

or I could end it with:

“reminding you that everyday is a better day with music in it.”

or simply end with:

“that will allow me to serve you best.”

Why do I present this script as solid? 

Here are the fundamental sales psychology reasons:

Using their name acknowledges them, and people love to hear their name and be addressed respectfully… preferably by a human.

Using your name right after theirs makes an audible connection in a friendly manner. It identifies who you are with, and allows them to remember back to their inquiry, which you are following up on. 

The second line helps bring down the barrier by using the word “friendly” and begins establishing trust with the word “dependable” and assures them you are local by calling out the marketplace name.

Asking for a call back at THEIR convenience displays a servant’s heart and lets them know you don’t want to inconvenience them. 

By using the word "brief", you are honoring the value of their time which helps you with rapport. 

By telling them you have a couple of brief questions let’s them know you will not be invasive and that you are searching for their information, feelings and needs.

The word “serve” allows them to feel in control and that you will be civil and respectful and the word “best” infers you will look after their specific needs. Reiterating your name is branding and ending with a hope that they are having a good day is just plain, a nice way to treat folks and get them to like you… you know, you’re applying the golden rule. 

You can craft your own approach and experiment all you want but the above is solid and proven. If you write one yourself, remember what you’re selling, and it's not what you’re selling. You are auditioning to be their “go to” for information. They didn’t sign up for “consent marketing" to make an immediate purchase; they were looking for information and you simply want them to have all they need. You have to sell credibility and make a friend before anything you ask, or tell, them will be real in their perception. You may catch someone in a curious moment who opens up but if you don’t make sure they respect where you are from and like you before you launch into a discovery, you have missed the opportunity to position yourself differently than the image of a selfish salesperson that lives large in their paranoia. You miss the opportunity to brand yourself as kind and helpful, not “get down to business” and atypical. 

Your approach, more than anything, should have the mission of setting yourself apart from the rest of the options they have, be they in person or online, where a huge portion of relationships start today. YOU ARE ON STAGE. They are, first rattle out of the box, sizing you up:

A) to see if they like you

B) to determine if you have any value to them

C) to see how comfortable the feel letting you into their world and their feelings

In the luxury marketing space, we sell lifestyle embellishment. You are the conduit. Making them feel safe with you involved in their decision-making is your first and only goal. I’ve said it a million times and until more sales people put it into practice, I’ll say it again: Credibility and Rapport BEFORE the fact finding. With larger ticket items, you can kick e-commerce’s digital ass by making friends first. With larger ticket items (80/20 rule invoked), friendship is your competitive edge. It bears much more weight than nuts and bolts and shopping carts in the high end luxury field. 

In the 1980’s Head and Shoulders shampoo took an old cliche and made it into one of the most successful campaigns in TV history. It was, ”Because you never get a second chance to make a first impression.” That fact should be burned into your mind.. and not because you have dandruff. The level of success you have in your sales career depends on how many people you can get permission to serve. You cannot assume they will like you. You need to give as many as possible the opportunity to like you, and the enthusiasm (it can be subdued and calm but needs to exist) that you portray in those first critical moments is just that: CRITICAL. Don’t believe me? Take a look at the most successful piano sales people of all time, people like Maurice Unis, Glenn Gough, Sandy Boyce, Bill McCormick, Matt Perez, Hale Ryan, Jim Hoover and our own Clyde the Guy. What did/do they all have in common? They could light up the room with positivity and make prospects/strangers feel welcome in a heartbeat. 

We have scripts constructed to deepen relationships and enable piano sales professionals to make more friends than their competition. There are also nurturing techniques that reinforce them and shepherd a prospect down the sales funnel but that is a conversation for another day. Why? Because none of that matters if you don’t get the first few seconds of a voice mail or “live” conversation right. 

How important are the first 5 seconds? In most instances they determine how much time you get to spend helping a shopper… or not. Since everything good or bad starts with an attitude (I used to tell my children that), make sure yours is in line with success and getting permission to be a person's tour guide. AI can’t compete with that, neither can distance online piano sales poachers. Truth be told, so few piano people pay enough attention to sales psychology, so having an effective first impression can give you a head start over all the other options so… on your mark, get set (Ben Franklin would say “prepared),go!

Go make friends and do it better than anyone in your market. You’ll be amazed at how much fun getting the first few seconds efficient can contribute to your success and how many more people you can serve.

“Sales are contingent upon the attitude of the salesman, not the attitude of the prospect.” - W. Clement Stone